Dining with opinionated people

[sr71blackbird]

I had a dining experience yesterday that happens to me once in a while that I never know how to handle. I was having lunch with a woman who is very opinionated and near the end of the meal, the waiter (this was in Applebees by the way) had come over to ask if we wanted any dessert or coffee and the woman hadn't quite finished yet. She kind of laced into him a little, and he went away. I had an inward cringe. Later on, he came over and asked if we wanted the check and I indicated that I would, and he started taking the dishes off the table. The woman still hadn't finished and was actually still eating a little, and she just lost it and started complaining, how rude he was and making a scene. She has always been like this, basically saying whatever she feels and while this is ok and understandable, like in this example, I often find it very uncomfortable, because I am not at all confrontational. At the same time, she is a lady and I want to defend her. So I am in a quandary as how to handle these kinds of situations. Any suggestions?

[King Hippos Bandaid]

This is the reason why I reserve a Table for 2 on Cruises

:king:

[reillyluck]

dont eat at chain resteraunts with her. seriously.

To me, it seems like all chains want you in and out. I do find it rude to ask if you want dessert if your still eating your meal. there is should to be at least 5 minutes of digestfor you done before they ask you if you want coffee or dessert.

but at the same time, she just needs a bit more patience. if she does it again, just make a joke out of it to her. she might get it if you say it to her with humor.

[FUNKMAN]

i sometimes consider it rude as well on the waiter's part (the more upscale the restaurant the ruder it is) but all you have to say is "i'm not finished" and send him/her on her way. your friend went overboard.

opinionated people i believe bug everyone, especially opinionated people unless you agree with them. you see i am of the opinion...blah blah blah blah :smile:

[RoseBlood]

She doesn't sound opinionated, she sounds rude and tactless. The more upscale the restaurant the more time they allow you to relax and enjoy your meal. While I don't like to feel rushed, I'm never surprised when it happens at chain restaurants. The waitress sounds like she was inexperienced? Was your friend in the middle of eating when the waiter asked if she was ready for dessert/coffee? If so, yeah I'd be annoyed but I agree, friend went overboard. Many people do not know the proper etiquette to signal they are finished with their meal, so I can see confusion arising, however a good waitor probably could've avoided that confrontation.

Of course cutting this woman out of future dining experiences is an option but may I ask how you know this woman? Is she a co-worker/business associate where for the good of office politics you must have lunch with her or something?

[mdr55]

Is she hot???


Why do you bother even eating with her if you knew that stuff about her and how she is??

[Kris10]

I'd say I'm not finished but I wouldn't have caused a scene about it. I'll admit, I have no problem at all saying what I feel regardless of where I am but it does sound like she went overboard. It's only a restaurant for crying out loud. The waiter could have been inexperienced.

I can't stand that "she is a lady, and I want to defend her" thing though. Grrrrrrr. No offense to you sr71!

[Bulldogcakes]

She doesn't sound opinionated, she sounds rude and tactless.

Ding ding ding. The word "asshole" comes to mind as well.

If that happened to me I would have left double my usual tip, with a little note "Sorry about my friend" on the bill.

I just don't get people who are rude to waiters and waitresses. They are taking care of you, giving you whatever you need and trying to make a living for themselves. You'd think people would appreciate that.

[IMSlacker]

This woman you went to Applebees with is your mom, isn't it? Come on, fess up! Why else would you be eating at Applebees with this rude person?

[buzzard]

Not having any knowledge on this subject,I asked my wife...she said she simply slinks away when I do that.:lol:

[sr71blackbird]

She is kinda hot. It did make me want to slink away. She is a friend/coworker and we dine together often. I have been with her in the super market when she orders stuff from the deli counter and if the people question what she orders or she gets whatever signal she gets that triggers this, she will let them have it. She lets me have it too, if I say or do certain things.
I have debated showing her the movie Waiting...

[mdr55]

Sounds like she needs a good screw. Go for it!!!

[sr71blackbird]

She'd probably complain about the size of my schwantz!

[KC2OSO]

She'd probably complain about the size of my schwantz!
Maybe the waiter can help?

[joethebartender]

At an Applebee's or any other one of those "T.G.I. Fridigan's" you have to expect that kind of service. Find a nice local family owned place where the employees give a shit. Also at a corporate place like that those servers have to take that kind of crap.

I had a customer, at a table of 3, tell the watress to fuck off when she checked back in with them for another drink or the check. I told him to pay and leave. He gave me his credit card, I ran it, and then he said that he wanted to "finish up for a little while". That's when I went to my "last resort" tactic, and that is mob mentality. You simply state loud and clear to the bar that there will be no future beverage service until asshole X,Y or Z is out of the place. It works like magic. The smug face usually turns to one of fear and they're out the door in no time. (this only happens about once every 6 months.)

As for your "opinionated" friend, I just hope she doesn't take that kind of action when something's not right on her plate.
http://images.allmoviephoto.com/2000_Road_Trip/dj_qualls_road_trip_001.jpg

[Kris10]

If she's hot, screw her. Believe me, she needs it---if she's anything like me she does!

[envirogator]

I had a boss that was an insecure loud-mouthed belittler who took every opportunity to draw attention to his supposed hard-assedness. We were out to dinner with three of my top clients (I didn't want him there to begin with but he created his own invitation). This was a big celebratory dinner and my boss ordered a bottle of Opus 1 for the table (~$450). The waiter brought the wine, went through the tasting ceremony when my asshole boss proclaimed loudly that the wine was not up to his standard and ordered the waiter to return with a new bottle. The wine steward came to the table, tasted the wine, stated that the wine was perfectly fine and suggested that my bosses palate was not accustomed to wine of this caliber. He offered to bring another bottle but would charge for the first one as it was satisfactory. My boss was purple in the face with humiliation, tried to meekly argue, then concented to drink the original wine.

My clients and I were horrified at the display, laughed about it later, and still laugh to this day. He never went to dinner with me again

[JackStraw]

If I am every at a restaurant with anyone who is at all rude to the waitstaff I simply try to rush through the meal without any furthur confrontation, find and pull the waitress/waiter aside, apologize and give them some cash (amount deemed necessary based on the rudeness of my dining companion), and then never hang out with that person ever again.

[ralphbxny]

If she's hot, screw her. Believe me, she needs it---if she's anything like me she does!

You have just become one of my favorite people now!!!

[commish13]

Would it be out of line to call her NoFilterCuntbag?

I could be stepping over my boundary here.

[Justice4all]

At the same time, she is a lady and I want to defend her. So I am in a quandary as how to handle these kinds of situations. Any suggestions?


A lady? A LADY? Jesus SR she was the furthest thing FROM being a lady.
Hot or not...that asshole deserved to be berated and forced to apologize for over-reacting.

I would sit her down and make her watch a certain scene from the movie WAITING. That might give her a nice wake up call about her shitty attitude.

<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Tb7eRnjwir0"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Tb7eRnjwir0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

[keithy_19]

I thought the thread said "Dining with oriental people".

Since that's not the case this thread is now useless to me.

[A.J.]

I just don't get people who are rude to waiters and waitresses. They are taking care of you, giving you whatever you need and trying to make a living for themselves. You'd think people would appreciate that.

If I was King, I'd make it mandatory for everyone in this country to work as a waiter or a bartender for a year. It would teach people to be better customers/tippers. I quit bartending back in college because I wanted to take a baseball bat to the skulls of so many pain in the ass customers. "The customer is NOT always right."

To quote Randall from "Clerks", "this job would be great if it weren't for the fucking customers."

[badmonkey]

I worked in several restaurants in pretty much all positions and while the waiter probably didn't deserve as much as he got, you do not attempt to take plates from people who are actively eating. You keep an eye on the table for a few minutes and if they appear to be finished, then approach them. If you see a lot of empty plates on their table, it is acceptable to offer to remove some of them, which gives the customer an opportunity to let you know they're done with their meal and you can take plate that too. The waiter should have gotten the message the first time she told him he wasn't finished and realized she was a bitch and been more careful the second time around. :)

Badmonkey

[outlawfrank]

I have three of my own restaurants in the Detroit area. I see this all the time, my servers generally are treated well, sometimes they are abused as if there not even a human. When I go out with a girl/friends and they do this I will sit there and pretend like everything is normal. Afterwards sometime later I inform this person what I saw them do, and that if they do it again I will through money on the table and leave them in the restaurant. I have done this, I also make it a point to apoligize to the server on the way out. There are plenty of reasons the service could have been poor, fight with spouse, child sick, car stolen, new job etc. That is life, just got to roll with it. The other angle, possible the person your'e with is impossible to please. Also recognize your surroundings.

I have this problem when it comes to tipping, one of my friends will put the meal on his credit card and we'll give him the money plus tip usually 22%. I've looked at the bill and the m-fer put only 15%. I let everyone I know from now on I may give you money for the meal, but I will always tip in cash. You are cheap a-holes, and I can't believe were friends.

[joethebartender]

It really doesn't apply to the kind of places we're talking about...but, if you are finished eating you simply cross your silverware over the plate. This will always be noted at any kind of fine dining spot.

Love,
Joe

[commish13]

Or you could always eat a little faster. How fucking long was it taking this chick to eat?

[Kris10]

It really doesn't apply to the kind of places we're talking about...but, if you are finished eating you simply cross your silverware over the plate. This will always be noted at any kind of fine dining spot.

Love,
Joe


Awwwww, he signs his posts LOVE, Joe!

[envirogator]

i agree....

LOVE Gator