I ejaculated into a cup not once, but twice!

[RhinoinMN]

All this talk about balls has got me reminiscing.

About 6 years ago my wife had difficulty getting pregnant. We went to a fertility doctor to get checked out. I was my duty to submit a seminal sample. I was mortified at the thought of it, but they told me that I could do it in the comfort of my own home.

Reaching climax with your partner or by yourself is indeed a wonderful thing until you have to direct it into something the size of a Dixie cup. Add on the stress of delivering the cup within a specified time frame and maintaining its original temperature. It takes all of the fun out of it.

A couple of days later they called and said that the numbers were abnormally high and that I have to do it again. This time at their facility. So I made the walk of shame and did "it" again and drove home full of shame.

The numbers this time were higher than before, and I now have 2 beautiful children to prove it.

Utterly embarrassing experience.

Anybody else go through something similar?

[FUNKMAN]

after working at the colgate plant in jersey city for 4 years i was contacted by a govt agency that wanted to test my sperm and would pay 50 bucks. they spoke of checking for lead or other chemicals in the semen.

i went downtown to cityhall on a sat or sun and a cop let me in. it seemed there was noone in the bldg besides me and the female, maybe early30's, labtech.

i walk into the room where she has her equip, she walks over to me and asks me to take drop my pants about thigh high. she then kneels down and starts measuring my testicles with some metal measuring instrument, she then just basically started playing with my balls. Checking texture and how they moved I guess. I was getting an erection and she just made a quick comment that it was normal :-(

next she gave me the cup and i went upstairs and made a donation.

i brought it downstairs and there was a good amount, nice and white and rich.

anyway - we wound up sitting together looking at my sperm swimming around under a microscope

then I left and i got my 50 dollars a week or two later but never any results

[Friday]

hey, at least you get to climax for your test results!

i once had a procedure done that is similar to the tests women go through to see the condition of their uterus... only mine was not done for child-bearing purposes.
it can only be described as chilly, slimy insertion with a plastic probe/camera.

my mom used to call it sex with a copay. she was a silly one!

[ChrisTheCop]

2 jacks, one cup.

http://www.frontiernet.net/~joe14580/applause%20sign.gif

[topless_mike]

2 jacks, one cup.

http://www.frontiernet.net/~joe14580/applause%20sign.gif

i hate you
bagel in mouth + roaring laughter= chewed bagel all over desk.

[GvacMobile]

This thread is useless without...

[Hottub]

Not into a cup, but I have ejaculated into a box.

[Tall_James]

This thread is useless without...

http://www.lowculture.com/archives/images/dixie_cup2.jpg

Try and fill that tough guy.

[topless_mike]

Try and fill that tough guy.

No problem ace.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/95/Peter_North_Handclasp.jpg/200px-Peter_North_Handclasp.jpg

[DolaMight]

http://www.lowculture.com/archives/images/dixie_cup2.jpg

Try and fill that tough guy.

Especially hard with John Edwards watching and smiling.

[hexy68]

Not into a cup, but I have ejaculated into a box.

what was her name?

[Midkiff]

http://i101.photobucket.com/albums/m48/jdmidkiff/drink3.jpg

[EliSnow]

Prior to treatment for testicular cancer almost 13 years ago, I had to bank some sperm, in case the treatment left me sterile. I think I went in a number of times. I always had to go to the doctor's office where they'd have rooms with some magazines and some porn.

Then years after the treatment, when my wife and I were planning on trying to get her pregnant, I went in again to check my mobility. Because of the treatment, it was lower than normal, but still high for someone having gone through the treatment.

But considering I now have two daughters, it looks like everything is fine.

[RhinoinMN]

http://i101.photobucket.com/albums/m48/jdmidkiff/drink3.jpg

banana smoothie?

[mendyweiss]

Is "Cup" Code For Man-Ass ? Just Askin

[Marc with a c]

so. I know someone that tasted his father's ejaculate.

[Hottub]

http://mccs1977.com/Images/Misc./Last_Snowball.jpg

[EliSnow]

banana smoothie?

Methinks, there is nothing smooth about that drink.

Maybe a banana bitterie? Banana salty?

[hurlmon]

Prior to treatment for testicular cancer almost 13 years ago, I had to bank some sperm, in case the treatment left me sterile. I think I went in a number of times. I always had to go to the doctor's office where they'd have rooms with some magazines and some porn.
.

Same exact deal for me and I didn't need to use them. Had a son the fun way.

My Dr office's jack rooms where hysterical. Slightly larger than a closet with a 13" tv, vcr, stacks of porn movies, mags and a recliner with that dr's office exam table paper over it.
And of course a small sink in the corner to clean up. Basically a room any jack happy kid dreams of.

Before my first deposit I thought to ask the Doc. if my wife could ... (ahem) ... assist with the sample making.

I got a green light on that.:thumbup:

I wish I had a camera for the times i walked out of the doorway from the jacking rooms and into the waiting room with the Mrs in tow.

Every guy always had a "what.. huh..what...you can bring in a girl" look on their face
Made the experience a bit more fun.

EliSnow, what age were you diagnosed? I and most guys I'n spoken to who had it were diagnosed at 29. Just curious.

[EliSnow]

EliSnow, what age were you diagnosed? I and most guys I'n spoken to who had it were diagnosed at 29. Just curious.

The date was September 12, 1995, just a couple of weeks after starting my first year of law school. I was 23.

[hurlmon]

The date was September 12, 1995, just a couple of weeks after starting my first year of law school. I was 23.

that's the yougest I've heard.

Glad everything has worked out for you.

[Midkiff]

hurlmon, did they give your chick any restrictions, like the wife couldn't touch you? or was she able to blow you, then just pop it into the cup at the last second?

[hurlmon]

hurlmon, did they give your chick any restrictions, like the wife couldn't touch you? or was she able to blow you, then just pop it into the cup at the last second?


It was the blow with the finish directly into the cup,just no touching the inside of the cup. We could've have had sex but the "condom" they give you to use is basically a sandwich bag. and would have had to be held on by hand. No elasticity to it at all.

[EliSnow]

that's the yougest I've heard.

Glad everything has worked out for you.

Glad it worked for you as well.

My roommate at that time admitted after I was diagnosed that he was diagnosed in high school.

[Death Metal Moe]

http://www.blackhawkmartialarts.com/images/BH1419.jpg

I guess playing ball with the boys can get a guy all worked up, can't it?

[Team_Ramrod]

I have 3 kids and decided it was enough, so I went for a vasectomy.

Post vasectomy, I had to give a sample every month to be analyzed by the lab so I could get the go ahead to stop with the gimmick sex (condoms, pulling out, etc.).

It took 4 months to get my count to zero after the procedure... I was able to go home with the cup and bag and rub one out there. It was still a little embarrassing walking into the clinic and dropping off a brown paper bag every month.

My chick didn't even help me with the jacking, so I felt like a 2 time loser.

[ralphbxny]

If you filled it up from across the room...now thats aim.

[DarkHippie]

Is "Cup" Code For Man-Ass ?

Isn't everything?

[bobsnin]

I ejaculated ON an A cup in high school. Does that count?

[SatCam]

Ive ejaculated into a cup.


It wasnt for science though:king:

[Hottub]

Sat ejaculated into a sock.
Not once, but 1,872 times.

[Bossanova]

Gvac and I do this every weekend, then we line them up and do shots. Its kind of wierd when you get your own though

[SatCam]

Sat ejaculated into a sock.
Not once, but 1,872 times.

dont act like everyone else doesnt do this

[Jughead]

Went through that....Dr gave me clomid(sp)...Womens fertility drug ...They said my count was low because of hot lights and my lifestyle.....2 months later My son Nick...1986..As far as the sample goes I went home did my thing and put my sample in my sweatshirt(Winter time)....Jokes forth cuming...

[Sarge]

I had do do it numerous times while going through I.V.F. The worst part was when the lab tech would come into the waiting room dressed in his lab gear and call your name. Everyone in there knew what you were about to go do. Then you had to follow him down the hall to an unmarked door that lead to the room you take care of business in. When you are done you leave the sample in a small cabinet that connected to the lab, and turned on a light switch to let them know you are done.

[Justice4all]

after working at the colgate plant in jersey city for 4 years i was contacted by a govt agency that wanted to test my sperm and would pay 50 bucks. they spoke of checking for lead or other chemicals in the semen.

i went downtown to cityhall on a sat or sun and a cop let me in. it seemed there was noone in the bldg besides me and the female, maybe early30's, labtech.

i walk into the room where she has her equip, she walks over to me and asks me to take drop my pants about thigh high. she then kneels down and starts measuring my testicles with some metal measuring instrument, she then just basically started playing with my balls. Checking texture and how they moved I guess. I was getting an erection and she just made a quick comment that it was normal :-(

next she gave me the cup and i went upstairs and made a donation.

i brought it downstairs and there was a good amount, nice and white and rich.

anyway - we wound up sitting together looking at my sperm swimming around under a microscope

then I left and i got my 50 dollars a week or two later but never any results


How do you know they didn't use the swim team to help fertilize a few women in the meantime?
I can see it now there are about 4 mini funks running around this world going "Madone" for reasons they can't understand.

But uhhhh....."nice and white and rich"....can also describe Bill Gates.

[jeffdwright2001]

Especially hard with John Edwards watching and smiling.

Must be the haircut.

[Drunky McBetidont]

i jacked in somebody's shampoo bottle in high school. i was at a party and was mad that they ran out of alcohol. i left some empty beer bottles under the parents pillows too.:innocent:

[RhinoinMN]

i jacked in somebody's shampoo bottle in high school. i was at a party and was mad that they ran out of alcohol. i left some empty beer bottles under the parents pillows too.:innocent:

<-------Note to self:

Always keep the fridge and cabinet well stocked when betidont comes over.

[jeffdwright2001]

i jacked in somebody's shampoo bottle in high school. i was at a party and was mad that they ran out of alcohol. i left some empty beer bottles under the parents pillows too.:innocent:

That's Suave.

[Hottub]

Goddam!:clap:

Welcome home. Jeff.

[FUNKMAN]

That's Suave.

or that new stuff, Spert

[Suspect Chin]

An educational thread...

[IamFogHat]

Gwen officially hates John for bringing this back up.

[RhinoinMN]

An educational thread...


I agree. People need to see this.

[mikeyboy]

What does this have to do with armpit babies?

[GregoryJoseph]

I agree. People need to see this.

I got ten bucks that says you can't do it again.

[TooLowBrow]

I got ten bucks that says you can't do it again.

close your mouth

[TooLowBrow]

Fart!:banning:

[FrogSlayer]

I have got a cup Full that I have been saving for a special occasion

[biggirl]

I had a probe shoved up my vagina and got to see all sorts of pics of my insides. then I had some weird thing shoved up my vagina again, but instead it shot dye up into my fallopian tubes to see if there were any blockages. I also had a number of blood draws, shots, and weight gain from all the fertility drugs I had to take.

I ended up with 2 beautiful children. I am the luckiest woman alive.

[FrogSlayer]

I had a probe shoved up my vagina and got to see all sorts of pics of my insides. then I had some weird thing shoved up my vagina again, but instead it shot dye up into my fallopian tubes to see if there were any blockages. I also had a number of blood draws, shots, and weight gain from all the fertility drugs I had to take.

I ended up with 2 beautiful children. I am the luckiest woman alive.

Pics or it didn't happen

[biggirl]

Pics or it didn't happen

of the procedures or the kids? I have a great pic of the placenta from greta's birth. Ryan felt he needed a picture of it.

[RhinoinMN]

What does this have to do with armpit babies?

We had to find out if it was me or Gwen's armpits that were sterile. Luckily it was neither.

[mikeyboy]

of the procedures or the kids? I have a great pic of the placenta from greta's birth. Ryan felt he needed a picture of it.

In my mind, he has it on a plate in one hand and a beer in the other.

[TripleSkeet]

All this talk about balls has got me reminiscing.

About 6 years ago my wife had difficulty getting pregnant. We went to a fertility doctor to get checked out. I was my duty to submit a seminal sample. I was mortified at the thought of it, but they told me that I could do it in the comfort of my own home.

Reaching climax with your partner or by yourself is indeed a wonderful thing until you have to direct it into something the size of a Dixie cup. Add on the stress of delivering the cup within a specified time frame and maintaining its original temperature. It takes all of the fun out of it.

A couple of days later they called and said that the numbers were abnormally high and that I have to do it again. This time at their facility. So I made the walk of shame and did "it" again and drove home full of shame.

The numbers this time were higher than before, and I now have 2 beautiful children to prove it.

Utterly embarrassing experience.

Anybody else go through something similar?

I went through something like this, only they made me come back because they said it was too thick to get an accurate sperm count. Same thing happened the second time. Apparently, I cum Elmers Glue.

Thank God she got pregnant right afterwards, before we started any kind of fertility treatments. Now Ive got 2 kids and Im ready to get snipped.