Things East Side Dave Should Not Do During the Birth of His Daughter

[STC-Dub]

I thought we might offer East Side some advice, and make some suggestion of things he should not do while Casey is giving birth :wink: :

Jacking in the delivery room.
Sticking the umbilical cord in his ass.

[furie]

make it about himself

[reillyluck]

Dont piss Casey off.

[Hottub]

A "Power Hour" during delivery may not be the best idea.

[nukinfuts]

I thought we might offer East Side some advice, and make some suggestion of things he should not do while Casey is giving birth :wink: :

Jacking in the delivery room.
Sticking the umbilical cord in his ass.

Sticking ANYTHING in his ass.

[smiler grogan]

don't do that scream when Julianna comes out the shoot.

[jonyrotn]

Don't try to do shots of rubbing alcohol out of Casey's enlarged belly button..
Don't leave Casey alone with the hospital's chef..

[Kris10]

Don't be there

[albo60s]

Don't channel surf on the delivery room tv.

[AngelAmy]

Don't channel surf on the delivery room tv.

I could definately see him doing this.

[joethebartender]

Don't channel surf on the delivery room tv.

He'll probably feel right at home with the TVs so close to the ceiling.

He shouldn't eat/handle shit and kiss the baby.

[topless_mike]

he shouldnt worry about anything else in the world, except his wife and daughter.

[nukinfuts]

I thought we might offer East Side some advice, and make some suggestion of things he should not do while Casey is giving birth :wink: :

Jacking in the delivery room.
Sticking the umbilical cord in his ass.

Don't look at the monitor they use to measure the contractions and say "Man that was a big one, I bet that hurt."

[Chigworthy]

Call his wife his mom, or vice versa.

[scottinnj]

volunteer to give casey the epidural.

[AnnoyedGrunt]

He probably shouldn't bring up the break up of Jonathan and Lilly at any point.

[scottinnj]

root through the sharps container for any "leftovers"

[Fallon]

Do "hospital gossip".

[scottinnj]

ask the doctor between contractions when it'll be okay to have sex again.

[scottinnj]

dress up in his "midnight rider" outfit and use julianas umbilical cord as a lasso.

[scottinnj]

say "hooray" when the placenta comes out.

[MadMatt]

Don't say "Shhhh, baby. Shhhh." in a fake Barry White voice when she is trying to push the baby out.

Even though it was an inside joke and I was trying to lighten the mood after 14 hours of labor, I still almost had my nutsack ripped off for doing it.

At least I thought it was funny... :laugh:

[scottinnj]

start calling casey his "hot little milf"

[scottinnj]

bring diaper samples into the studio for show and tell.

[Jughead]

No selling Hot Dogs to the staff....:wink:

[scottinnj]

set up an appointment for julianna's brisque.
she's a girl dave. the answer is no.

[scottinnj]

do not ask the doctor if he has a bootleg of the new indy movie.

[scottinnj]

volunteer for any drug trials.

[scottinnj]

he should not use a bill cosby comedy bit as a substitute for lamasse class.

[watson]

he should not be thinking he needs to get back to work on tuesday

[scottinnj]

eat juliannas gerber food for a radio stunt.

[scottinnj]

dave should not have a wheelchair race to celebrate now that she is born.

[bobsnin]

Well, I made this joke in the birth thread, but heaven forbid we make a joke during a serious time, even though that's what this whole website/radio show revolves around.
<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/56126935@N00/2517881292/" title="DAVECASEYPICS1 by bobsnin, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3038/2517881292_554608a3b1_m.jpg" width="240" height="180" alt="DAVECASEYPICS1" /></a>
<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/56126935@N00/2517062559/" title="bigfootdave by bobsnin, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2113/2517062559_9c771fb9e4_m.jpg" width="199" height="240" alt="bigfootdave" /></a>

[scottinnj]

he shouldn't ask the doc what knot he's gonna use if casey gonna get her tubes tied.

[scottinnj]

He should not be disappointed if Julianna's first words aren't "R&F noon to three"

[PapaBear]

he should not be thinking he needs to get back to work on tuesday
When my third child was born, I went back to work 2 hours later. It was an absolute financial necessity, but she never forgave me. So, yeah... Even if he has to live in a car, DON'T go back to work too soon!

[bobsnin]

He shouldn't serve peanut butter and dick-jelly sandwiches to the OBGYN

[Rube]

Dave should never...ever, shake the baby.:wacko:

[bobsnin]

Dave should never...ever, shake the baby.:wacko:

Rube!

[usoilworker]

asking for an extra stich is probably a no no. id also avoide asking for if he can get a lap dance from the candy stripers

[Caseyelan]

I could definately see him doing this.

he did.

[Epschtein]

set up an appointment for julianna's brisque.
she's a girl dave.

i always thought it was "briss" so i googled it... last time i eat brisket...

http://mysite.verizon.net/epschtein/briss.jpg

[tnbt23]

Do "hospital gossip".

:thumbup: Fallon, I have never, ever in my life LOL'd at something I've read on the internetz, but goddamn man, for some reason I have been laughing at that post for the past 20 minutes and I can't explain to other people why I'm laughing and it frustrates the hell outta me. Thank you for making an otherwise miserable day much more enjoyable...:wub::lol:

- no homo -

[patrick187]

fuck and/or eat the afterbirth.

[jonyrotn]

Well, I made this joke in the birth thread, but heaven forbid we make a joke during a serious time, even though that's what this whole website/radio show revolves around.
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3038/2517881292_554608a3b1_m.jpg (http://www.flickr.com/photos/56126935@N00/2517881292/)
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2113/2517062559_9c771fb9e4_m.jpg (http://www.flickr.com/photos/56126935@N00/2517062559/)
That's very funny..

When my third child was born, I went back to work 2 hours later. It was an absolute financial necessity, but she never forgave me. So, yeah... Even if he has to live in a car, DON'T go back to work too soon!
Does your kid know he ruined your lunch break?
Did hospital security give you shit for leaving the car double parked and running out front, while you ran upstairs?