2 years, no sex

[Skellington]

Again, this board needs a humping icon.

It's been almost 2 years since i've gotten laid or done the laying.

I'm oddly not phased by my snatch returning to virgin.

Just thought i'd share.

[hammersavage]

with some of these femmes around here, that makes you a slut.

[JerseyRich]

No sexual contact of any kind? or just intercourse?

[Skellington]

with some of these femmes around here, that makes you a slut.

At least i'd be a cute.

[hammersavage]

No sexual contact of any kind? or just intercourse?

go get your jollies off somewhere else. ya perv!

[GregoryJoseph]

I just recently took a vow of celibacy.

I'm enjoying it.

[Marc with a c]

prescription ran out?

[Skellington]

No sexual contact of any kind? or just intercourse?

none. of any nature. i posted a few months ago about the 'toy' dibolical. i'm oddly amused by my lack of interest. sexual harassment panda is very sad.

[JerseyRich]

Do you find your thoughts being clouded or more clear by this inactivity?

[underdog]

none. of any nature. i posted a few months ago about the 'toy' dibolical. i'm oddly amused by my lack of interest. sexual harassment panda is very sad.

Was the toy debacle when you sliced you wrist on the table?

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

I just recently took a vow of celibacy.

I'm enjoying it.

Celibacy? That's when you cum inside them right?

[~Katja~]

Again, this board needs a humping icon.

It's been almost 2 years since i've gotten laid or done the laying.

I'm oddly not phased by my snatch returning to virgin.

Just thought i'd share.
hey it's better than having shitty sex with shitty dates. I m not quite at 2 years but close to that if you deduct the two terrible incidents with the guy I saw for a little while.

[JerseyRich]

hey it's better than having shitty sex with shitty dates. I m not quite at 2 years but close to that if you deduct the two terrible incidents with the guy I saw for a little while.

Two Terrible Incidents? explain.

[mikeyboy]

Two Terrible Incidents? explain.

:popcorn:

[EliSnow]

Two Terrible Incidents? explain.

Zip your pants back up.

[~Katja~]

Two Terrible Incidents? explain.
meh, let's just say he was not very good in the sack and I rather forget

[Aggie]

if you're fine with it than more power to ya! are you intentinonally avoiding it or has it just worked out that way?

i used to post about how horny i was all the time but that's not a problem anymore. i don't remember what it's like to go that long.

[mikeyboy]

meh, let's just say he was not very good in the sack and I rather forget

You're going to have to make up your own details, Rich. I'm going with the guy having an adult baby fetish.

[~Katja~]

You're going to have to make up your own details, Rich. I'm going with the guy having an adult baby fetish.
:laugh:

you are so weird sometimes

[JerseyRich]

You're going to have to make up your own details, Rich. I'm going with the guy having an adult baby fetish.

Either that or he would talk about the War.

[Marc with a c]

Either that or he would talk about the War.

no it wasn't that, i'm betting he wasn't into scat.

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

Either that or he would talk about the War.

Katja's German, no way that would be a turn off.

[hammersavage]

hey it's better than having shitty sex with shitty dates. I m not quite at 2 years but close to that if you deduct the two terrible incidents with the guy I saw for a little while.

3 pumps?

Did he try to explain that you should take it as a compliment?

[JerseyRich]

I'm curious if Skelly and Kat have shared their shower head remedy with each other.

[~Katja~]

Either that or he would talk about the War.
lol he actually did, not in bed but he was a history lover...

no it wasn't that, i'm betting he wasn't into scat.
yeah that's it! Fuck you! :)

3 pumps?

Did he try to explain that you should take it as a compliment?
that's a bingo... well kinda
it was just not worth my time or even the attempt of getting excited for...


but why is skellington not looking or dating?

[hammersavage]

Arizona is full of faggots.


Yea, I'm looking at you Kurt Warner.

[JerseyRich]

lol he actually did, not in bed but he was a history lover...


yeah that's it! Fuck you! :)


that's a bingo... well kinda
it was just not worth my time or even the attempt of getting excited for...


but why is skellington not looking or dating?

She's had various illnesses that have caused her physical pain I believe...that and getting into a fight with her glass top table.

But this is stuff you can search the board for. Or maybe she will explain and I can shut up!

[GregoryJoseph]

Sex is for procreation only.

Doing it merely for pleasure bastardizes its true meaning and purpose.

[~Katja~]

I know of the bedazzler and coffee table incidents, but that doesn't mean that she was unable to date.

[Marc with a c]

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/OLoNan-ApcI&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/OLoNan-ApcI&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[TooLowBrow]

Doing it merely for pleasure bastardizes its true meaning and purpose.

Doing it and leaving the pregnant mother bastardizes the child.

[hammersavage]

if anything, with the accidents she's had, she should have the market cornered on guys who think she's a cutter.


:bye:

[~Katja~]

I don't get it, she is a sexy chick, why is she alone?

[spankyfrank]

23 years for me!!! I'm going for the record!!! :wallbash:

[underdog]

I don't get it, she is a sexy chick, why is she alone?

Too much bedazzling.

[hammersavage]

Arizona is full of old people and queers apparently.

[Aggie]

I don't get it, she is a sexy chick, why is she alone?

I would ask the same of you, pretty lady.

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

Sex is for procreation only.

Doing it merely for pleasure bastardizes its true meaning and purpose.

Huh?

[GregoryJoseph]

23 years for me!!! I'm going for the record!!! :wallbash:

I think hammersavage has you beat...

[Furtherman]

I just recently took a vow of celibacy.

I'm enjoying it.

Me too. Only it just kinda happened and I'm not enjoying it. Fuck these surprise vows.

[Mitch&Murray]

Again, this board needs a humping icon.

It's been almost 2 years since i've gotten laid or done the laying.
.

I bet youre in the middle of the pack for longest time without sex on this board.

[underdog]

I would ask the same of you, pretty lady.

Too much bedazzling.

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

hey it's better than having shitty sex with shitty dates. I m not quite at 2 years but close to that if you deduct the two terrible incidents with the guy I saw for a little while.

Look no further. I bring you:

http://gizmodo.com/5407537/gifts-for-agoraphobes-who-really-prefer-the-indoors/gallery/3

[~Katja~]

Look no further. I bring you:

http://gizmodo.com/5407537/gifts-for-agoraphobes-who-really-prefer-the-indoors/gallery/3
they should rename that to orgasmic paradise

[sailor]

I just recently took a vow of celibacy.

I'm enjoying it.

You're not getting married? Hardly news.

[TeeBone]

A
I'm oddly not phased by my snatch returning to virgin.


Have you checked the 'Skinny Jeans' thread.....you aren't missing a thing.

[Gmann]

I bet youre in the middle of the pack for longest time without sex on this board.

JustJon being grand champion.

[JohnCharles]

Not more than 2 weeks for me.

[jauble]

Not more than 2 weeks for me.

Last time you saw Ryan?

[JohnCharles]

Last time you saw Ryan?

:wink:

[landarch]

Either that or he would talk about the War.

<a href="http://s36.photobucket.com/albums/e48/bshankle/?action=view&current=FawltyTowers044.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e48/bshankle/FawltyTowers044.jpg" border="0" alt="fawlty cleese"></a>

Don't mention the war! I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it!

[Tenbatsuzen]

JustJon being grand champion.

Fail. Blowhard.

[Kevin]

hey it's better than having shitty sex with shitty dates. I m not quite at 2 years but close to that if you deduct the two terrible incidents with the guy I saw for a little while.

Stupid Mickey Mouse.

[disneyspy]

Stupid Mickey Mouse.

hey!

[Contra]

meh, let's just say he was not very good in the sack and I rather forget

Sorry about that, I told you that you should take it as a compliment!

[SatCam]

its been two years for me too! i think i forgot how those things work

[midwestjeff]

I think I can help.

[deliciousV]

Look no further. I bring you:

http://gizmodo.com/5407537/gifts-for-agoraphobes-who-really-prefer-the-indoors/gallery/3

I don't know what an "alien probing station" is, but I'm oddly aroused.

[midwestjeff]

I don't know what an "alien probing station" is, but I'm oddly aroused.

I think I can help.

[Recyclerz]

Is this phenomenon the new way to support Fez?

Frankly, I'd rather go back to sending him Oreos.

[A.J.]

I just recently took a vow of celibacy.

So have I apparently.

[Skellington]

Have you checked the 'Skinny Jeans' thread.....you aren't missing a thing.

That would be part of the contribution of my 'lack of interest'. Seriously, if you can smash your dick up like that, you probably don't have much dick.

[Skellington]

I don't get it, she is a sexy chick, why is she alone?

Health never kept me from getting naked. After the year of awful awfulness that i went through with my ex, i took time to gather my sanity. There is one person on this board that knows the exact details, but I can conclude that for furture reference, if I am in the kitchen cooking you dinner, and you hit my 14lb dog and make him cry out, I will stab you with whatever I have in my hand, and it will hurt.... Once I left that situation, lived alone with my dogs, took time to get over it and not bitch about it anymore, I took a look at what AZ has to offer....then went back inside and took up knitting. I'm too old for college jocky idiots, and i get too annoyed by the lack of education and motivation out here.

The sad part is, due to the length of time since i last got nookie and being it was such awful nookie, the next poor soul that gets stuck with the current me is going to have to work past the whole 'tee hee, i'm shy, i have no fucking clue what i'm doing'. Bah humbug. :glurps:

[Furtherman]

Good for you sorting yourself out from a bad relationship.

There's nothing worse than a woman with baggage on a rebound.

I think the next guy will find himself very lucky. As long as he's a dog person.

[underdog]

There's nothing worse than a woman with baggage on a rebound.

Who are you? What has this modship done to you?

[Furtherman]

Who are you? What has this modship done to you?

Yea, yea, they're an easy lay, sure, I was just thinking of a relationship... jesus tap dancin' christ... it HAS been a long time.

[underdog]

Yea, yea, they're an easy lay, sure, I was just thinking of a relationship... jesus tap dancin' christ... it HAS been a long time.

Maybe you should be looking for the rebound.

[JerseyRich]

Health never kept me from getting naked. After the year of awful awfulness that i went through with my ex, i took time to gather my sanity. There is one person on this board that knows the exact details, but I can conclude that for furture reference, if I am in the kitchen cooking you dinner, and you hit my 14lb dog and make him cry out, I will stab you with whatever I have in my hand, and it will hurt.... Once I left that situation, lived alone with my dogs, took time to get over it and not bitch about it anymore, I took a look at what AZ has to offer....then went back inside and took up knitting. I'm too old for college jocky idiots, and i get too annoyed by the lack of education and motivation out here.

The sad part is, due to the length of time since i last got nookie and being it was such awful nookie, the next poor soul that gets stuck with the current me is going to have to work past the whole 'tee hee, i'm shy, i have no fucking clue what i'm doing'. Bah humbug. :glurps:

meh...it's like riding a bike...you don't forget how to do it.
It also helps when you have someone you care about and physical chemistry with. Sounds like you're on the path to stability...stay the course.

[hammersavage]

Its like fucking a bike

[boobieman]

Well if you don't have the seat on the bike, then that is a whole different type of sex.

Practice practice practice

SSEYAYAAEEAA

[opie's twisted balls]

I'm oddly not phased by my snatch returning to virgin.
http://i46.tinypic.com/2db53ro.jpg


I'm going with the guy having an adult baby fetish.
I'd say latex body suit, bag of cloths pins and a rubber chicken.

[topless_mike]

Health never kept me from getting naked. After the year of awful awfulness that i went through with my ex, i took time to gather my sanity. There is one person on this board that knows the exact details, but I can conclude that for furture reference, if I am in the kitchen cooking you dinner, and you hit my 14lb dog and make him cry out, I will stab you with whatever I have in my hand, and it will hurt.... Once I left that situation, lived alone with my dogs, took time to get over it and not bitch about it anymore, I took a look at what AZ has to offer....then went back inside and took up knitting. I'm too old for college jocky idiots, and i get too annoyed by the lack of education and motivation out here.

The sad part is, due to the length of time since i last got nookie and being it was such awful nookie, the next poor soul that gets stuck with the current me is going to have to work past the whole 'tee hee, i'm shy, i have no fucking clue what i'm doing'. Bah humbug. :glurps:

its all good yo. rich said it best. its all about the chemistry. sure, you can go find yourself a good fuck, but what good is it if you dont like to be around that person?

i wouldnt know you if you broke into my house and fucked my sister, but just from the awesome stories/posts that you've made around here, it seems that you are invincible. just do your thang and everything will line up for you. it has to. it has no choice. it is scared of you.

[Contra]

Health never kept me from getting naked. After the year of awful awfulness that i went through with my ex, i took time to gather my sanity. There is one person on this board that knows the exact details, but I can conclude that for furture reference, if I am in the kitchen cooking you dinner, and you hit my 14lb dog and make him cry out, I will stab you with whatever I have in my hand, and it will hurt.... Once I left that situation, lived alone with my dogs, took time to get over it and not bitch about it anymore, I took a look at what AZ has to offer....then went back inside and took up knitting. I'm too old for college jocky idiots, and i get too annoyed by the lack of education and motivation out here.

The sad part is, due to the length of time since i last got nookie and being it was such awful nookie, the next poor soul that gets stuck with the current me is going to have to work past the whole 'tee hee, i'm shy, i have no fucking clue what i'm doing'. Bah humbug. :glurps:

Bullet to the head for dog abuse!
Just reading that made me angry. Good luck skelly. If I was closer I'd be happy to reintroduce you to things :)

[boosterp]

Been there, the first time while going to college and working full time and the second was after my divorce. I'm all better for it.

[Chigworthy]

I'm going with the guy having an adult baby fetish.

I can't believe this one almost got away.

[boosterp]

http://i46.tinypic.com/2db53ro.jpg





You should be banned for that.

[Penelope]

I flew out here to see the ex for two weeks, after not seeing him for seven months. I will be going back home in 2 days. He says he's going to move me in here after the holidays, and we'll get married. I've heard this all before though and know he's a liar. I fall for it over and over again because I'm pathetic, and can't get over this one guy. I can't stop crying. Am hiding out a lot today so he won't see that I've been crying. Back to my life of moping around and celibacy.

[opie's twisted balls]

You should be banned for that.
I'd hit it!



































Only to say I was the first :cool:

[Dirtbag]

I'm working on 27 years. 2 doesn't seem like such a big deal.

[PapaBear]

I flew out here to see the ex for two weeks, after not seeing him for seven months. I will be going back home in 2 days. He says he's going to move me in here after the holidays, and we'll get married. I've heard this all before though and know he's a liar. I fall for it over and over again because I'm pathetic, and can't get over this one guy. I can't stop crying. Am hiding out a lot today so he won't see that I've been crying. Back to my life of moping around and celibacy.
If you do move in with him, DON'T get married. You may not be able to get over him, but marriage sounds like the worst idea possible in your situation. Though it would suck for the cycle of breaking up and getting back together to continue, throwing marriage into the mix would be far worse than you can imagine.

[Skellington]

I'm working on 27 years. 2 doesn't seem like such a big deal.

.....there's medication and a entire industry to remedy that......

2 really isn't all that bad. Most of it i've spent sorting myself out and regaining confidence and reintroducing myself to all the things that i enjoyed to do, and even some new things.... mostly activities that involve the dogs... like flyball, which is absolutely comedic when one of your dogs is horrified of the box, and the other one will keep hitting the box just to see the ball pop out. I guess the more sad part is the lack of interest in anyone out here. Seriously, there's quantity, but the quality is lacking so severly. buhhh.

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

I'd hit it!

Me too. . .with the fork side of a fork lift.

[SatCam]

Dirtbag

Join Date: May 2007
Location: Arizona



Skellington

Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Phoenix, AZ




hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[TheGameHHH]

.....there's medication and a entire industry to remedy that.....

yea, theyre called "roofies"

[Aggie]

Dirtbag

Join Date: May 2007
Location: Arizona



Skellington

Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Phoenix, AZ




hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


nothing good ever comes of trying to be a matchmaker.