I wipe my ass, then sniff the paper.

[SinA]

Occasionally. After a non-shitting attempt.

I don't think it would matter if I explained the thought process behind it, the fact that I do it at all is enough to make me a complete psycho.

[Judge Smails]

http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t13/AdelineArmy21/Random%20Avatars/thDumbandDUmber.gif

[opie's twisted balls]

http://i46.tinypic.com/2r3igzt.gif

[razorboy]

Started drinking early today?

[TripleSkeet]

http://img101.imageshack.us/img101/1305/27290534.gif (http://img101.imageshack.us/i/27290534.gif/)

[Jujubees2]

I thought I was the only one to do that.

[Leticia]

I'm not afraid to admit that I do this too. I always have. I won't try to explain it... I'm sure it's gross enough that I do it.

[Aggie]

i'm scared.

[epo]

I thought for sure that this would be a Jezo or SR71 thread...

[razorboy]

They were beat to the punch.

[opie's twisted balls]

OK, now that I've had some time to recover and rinse the bile from my mouth a few questions for you sick fucks....sorry, individuals with an adventurous rectal olfactory nature.

1) Why?
2) What are you hoping to smell? Nothing, the hint of shit, something musky or something else?
3) How long have you been doing this?
4) Did mommy rub your nose in your doodie when you were little and you're just trying to recreate those early memories?
5) Does anyone in your "real life" (i.e. not on a message board) know of your unique proclivities and if so do they support this activity or still recoil in horror every time you go to the shitter and hear you sniffing away?
6) Sorry, need to ask again....why?
7) Is this something you enjoy or has it just become kind of Pavlovian to sniff the toilet paper after you've gone for an unproductive squat.
8) How do you know there's nothing on the paper when you draw it out from the bowl post wipe? Just trying to think this through with the technique I use (take 4-5 squares, fold, lift the right cheek, wipe, drop paper in bowl, repeat till I feel clean and then give the final stack sitting in the bowl a look to make sure there's no crap on it when I stand up) and realized that since I'm lacking eyes by my asshole wouldn't know for certain that I'm brining up something thats poopless.
9) Is it a quick sniff or do you get right in there and take a great big snout full?
10) Have you ever got shit on the tip of your nose?

[TripleSkeet]

I thought for sure that this would be a Jezo or SR71 thread...

I thought the same exact thing.

[lleeder]

Do you do the same thing with your bfs cock?

[BlackSpider]

http://i145.photobucket.com/albums/r221/spidescorp/WTF.jpg...

[SatCam]

a safer and less wasteful way to smell your asshole would be to cup your hand on your crack, let one rip and then quickly bring the air contained in your palm to your nostrils

[sr71blackbird]

I thought for sure that this would be a Jezo or SR71 thread...

Haha. For a minute I though someone dug one of my old ones up from the vault

[razorboy]

Haha. For a minute I though someone dug one of my old ones up from the vault

And then sniffed it?

[Ocho Cinco]

i gotta say even for the confessional this is a bit much

[midwestjeff]

Why wipe if there was no shit?

I think you just sit down to pee and like the smell of man ass.

You might be gay.

[sr71blackbird]

Why wipe if there was no shit?

I think you just sit down to pee and like the smell of man ass.

You might be gay.

Whoa, whoa..hold on there.. I always wipe, even if I dont shit.
You never know what might be there, so its better to wipe while you are in that position to begin with.

[weekapaugjz]

Whoa, whoa..hold on there.. I always wipe, even if I dont shit.
You never know what might be there, so its better to wipe while you are in that position to begin with.

do you carry around a toothbrush as well?

[midwestjeff]

That's another thing, why sit down if you don't have to shit?

I have no idea what a "non-shitting attempt" is and how it happens.

[disneyspy]

That's another thing, why sit down if you don't have to shit?

I have no idea what a "non-shitting attempt" is and how it happens.

sometimes at night i dont like to turn on the light so ill just sit to pee,also when i have a ragin hard on when i wake up,i have to sit to pee or stand like 4 feet away

[epo]

Why wipe if there was no shit?

I think you just sit down to pee and like the smell of man ass.

You might be gay.

Might?

[weekapaugjz]

sometimes at night i dont like to turn on the light so ill just sit to pee,also when i have a ragin hard on when i wake up,i have to sit to pee or stand like 4 feet away

just admit it. you haven't had a hard on since 1992.

[BlackSpider]

sometimes at night i dont like to turn on the light so ill just sit to pee,also when i have a ragin hard on when i wake up,i have to sit to pee or stand like 4 feet away

How does that work...???

[Marc with a c]

sometimes at night i dont like to turn on the light so ill just sit to pee,also when i have a ragin hard on when i wake up,i have to sit to pee or stand like 4 feet away

what the fuck? that post put me in a bad mood.

[Bob Impact]

I wipe my ass, then sniff the paper.

http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c244/bobimpact/Edgedontwant2.jpg

[sr71blackbird]

If I sit, I wipe.
If I shit, I wipe.

[Death Metal Moe]

No sniffing, but even if there's nothing in the bowl I'll use a moist wipe, to make REALLY sure. No need to chance it, that's what they are there for. For insurance.

[Bob Impact]

The house Sarah and I are bidding on has a bidet. Enjoy your sniffing, savages.

[Death Metal Moe]

The house Sarah and I are bidding on has a bidet. Enjoy your sniffing, savages.

Very jealous, that's fucking awesome.

[Marc with a c]

The house Sarah and I are bidding on has a bidet. Enjoy your sniffing, savages.

i hope you don't get it you smug prick.

[IamFogHat]

Occasionally. After a non-shitting attempt.

I don't think it would matter if I explained the thought process behind it, the fact that I do it at all is enough to make me a complete psycho.

Why do you need us to validate you?

[Bob Impact]

i hope you don't get it you smug prick.

If I do I'll take a picture of me using it just for you.

[Marc with a c]

If I do I'll take a picture of me using it just for you.

from what i remember you'll need that thing to go to eleven.

[TheMojoPin]

The house Sarah and I are bidding on has a bidet. Enjoy your sniffing, savages.

Goddamn you.

[boosterp]

A bidet sucks, it just splatters shit every where and why do you want to douche your ass any ways?

[TheMojoPin]

A bidet sucks, it just splatters shit every where and why do you want to douche your ass any ways?

Sounds like you have a story behind this.

And yes, it's impossible to figure out why people would want to clean out the most foul, disgusting part of their body. IT'S BAFFLING.

[SatCam]

sometimes at night i dont like to turn on the light so ill just sit to pee,also when i have a ragin hard on when i wake up,i have to sit to pee or stand like 4 feet away

i know exactly what you mean..... when youre sitting you can push your bone lower than the rim of the toilet and hit the wall of the toilet

[disneyspy]

i know exactly what you mean..... when youre sitting you can push your bone lower than the rim of the toilet and hit the wall of the toilet

thank god,i didnt think any of these short peckered fellers knew what i was talkin about

[boosterp]

Sounds like you have a story behind this.

And yes, it's impossible to figure out why people would want to clean out the most foul, disgusting part of their body. IT'S BAFFLING.

No, just don't like the idea of a cold stream of water hitting my sphincter and splattering shit throughout. I'd rather smear it with toilette paper like a civilized savage.

[TheMojoPin]

Sir, that's not how a bidet works. Either that or you've got really sloppy shits.

[boosterp]

Sir, that's not how a bidet works. Either that or you've got really sloppy shits.

I think of it as the shower head on pulsate mode, am I wrong?

[opie's twisted balls]

I think of it as the shower head on pulsate mode, am I wrong?

More like a waterpik for your dumper. Some have a removable hand held shower type add on.

[TheMojoPin]

Very wrong. Think of it as a gentle forest brook, gently lapping between your cheeks.

That was pretty wrong, too.

[boosterp]

Very wrong. Think of it as a gentle forest brook, gently lapping between your cheeks.

That was pretty wrong, too.

:lol::lol::lol:

I stand corrected sir.